MISTAKES HAPPEN

While trying to recreate the good times of 131 College Place, I wore this tank top at our most recent get together -- this time to celebrate Lamont's fantasy success with a steak dinner in Albany.

The tank top was given to me by Aero, my Big Brother, upon becoming a brother in 1990. It's f-ing old. At the time, it was huge on me. Now, it can hardly contain my gut. The fact that it's faded to an almost urine-yellow is hard to see in the pic, which is courtesy of Spalding (Charlie McAteer).

ANGRY BEAR -- VERSION TWO

Stain remembers the story a little differently:

We were hanging out watching Friday Night NBA because Corky was sick and on medication, so he couldn't go out.

I remember Lamont coming out - and not saying a word - but having his "angry bear" look going.

Now here is the difference - he didn't take the ball.

He walked over to the rim (which was nailed in pretty good) and just totally "wrenched it" off the wall.

It was so funny, because he was so pissed, but the rim wouldn't come down easily - he had to twist it back and forth a few times before it came off.

And when he was done, he kinda slammed it down as though he had just dunked.

Then just walked away and went back into his cave without saying a word. We were just stunned for a minute - and then just started laughing.

I guess Lamont had gotten all banged up at an early happy hour and was already in bed for the night. Good times.....

I had thought the ball got deflated when it inadvertently hit a nail.

I can't remember who was in the middle room that year - but they had taken down the loft the that was built in there.

And the 2 x 4s (with nails sticking out) just stayed on the 2nd floor landing for several weeks as everybody just walked around it.

So, two different stories - but equally hilarious - I guess that is what happens after 15 years.

ANGRY BEAR -- VERSION ONE

Picture this (as told to Squig from Corky):

It's Friday night around 9:30 p.m. at the Crow House. The house is silent because everyone is out at the bars except for Corky and Stain, who get into a serious game of nurf basketball on the second floor landing.

If you recall, Corky had a strong wire rim and a pizza hut plastic ball to play with. So he and Stain go at it for a good half hour. Body checks, dunks, yelling, sweat, the whole deal.

At some point, the ball rolls in front of Lamont's door (second floor, front of the building). Slowly the door opens and a hairy paw reaches down and grabs the ball.

Corky and Stain are stunned because they didn't think anyone was home. They then watch Lamont grab a knife from his room and try to stab the ball furiously. Lamont's arm is recreating Psycho attempting to puncture the ball with the knife.

Corky reasons with him, Lamont stops and gives them back the ball. He then resumes his pass-out.

Awesome story. I had never heard it.

HAHAHAHA

For all the Masshole brothers:

Red Sox’ Sellout Streak In Jeopardy After Dreadful August

Could Red Sox' SelloutStreak Come To An End? While the Red Sox have sold out every home game since May 15, 2003, “there is no guarantee that the streak will continue through the rest of the season,” amid the team’s “recent free-fall in the pennant race,” according to MacQuarrie & Ryan of the BOSTON GLOBE in a front-page piece. Red Sox VP/Ticketing Ron Bumgarner noted the team holds 300 tickets per game for walk-ups and said, “The true test will be this upcoming homestand.” The Red Sox play ten straight home games starting tonight against the Blue Jays, White Sox and Royals. But Red Sox Exec VP/Public Affairs Charles Steinberg said that he “expected the sellout streak — the second-longest in major-league history — to continue.” MacQuarrie & Ryan note “just a few weeks ago, it was nearly impossible to get” a ticket to a Red Sox home game, but now tickets “are not only available, they can be had for face value or less.” Ticket holder Liz Brownell is selling $45 grandstand seats for Sunday’s Blue Jays game at face value; “similar seats fetched $150 each” when the Red Sox were in first place in the AL East earlier this season. MacQuarrie & Ryan note “even ticket agencies ... are offering their best prices in years.” Fenway Park has the smallest capacity in MLB (BOSTON GLOBE, 8/31).

EXCHANGE

A recent Instant Message (IM) with Bitch:

robwlead: im a really good drinker now. i just drink beer. i can actually drink them, say starting on the golf course in the morning, and drink all day and night and be ok. its weird. it amazes my girl.

SHENANIGANS REMEMBERED

The third-floor bathroom stall was once a graffiti-riddled palate for some of the greatest sayings in Crow history. My favorite was "Don't fire until you smell Lamont's ass."

However, most have fadded from memory. Please add others, we must reconstruct this wall.

BROTHER UPDATE

Bitch is getting married on February 24, 2007.

Although best known for wearing nothing but underwear while sleeping with Romer and for the mysterious tar pit in the room he shared with Sap, Bitch is apparently becoming quite the respectable citizen. He currently resides in AZ.

CROW HAPPENINGS

Eight Crows -- Squig, Tulio, Spooge, Lamont, Fran, Charlie, Jerky, Sap -- recently conducted their sixth Fantasy Football Draft. The winner receives a free steak dinner.

Fran chose Larry Johnson of KC with the first pick through a trade with Tulio.

Jeff Stefanko has won four of the five previous seasons, which included three Arena Football League fantasy tournaments. Sap won the other.

Steak dinners took place at Sparks (NYC), Old Homestead (NYC), and a quality place in Albany.

BROTHER UPDATE

Aero recently made a bid for smartest Crow ever. He was accepted to a Cambridge University fellowship, spent a month studying a subject too intelligent to be understood on these pages, and then was PAID to spend two weeks in Paris writing a paper about it. Ultimate Crow boondoggle.

Apparently during his research, he handled some of Charles Darwin's actual papers. Unless Al D'Amato has touched the Constitution, Aero has probably handled the most important documents a Crow has ever layed hands on. No word on whether any booby traps were left.

He has recently left Wired Magazine to become a senior editor at Fortune and is stil based in SF.

BROTHER UPDATE

Liability emailed me a few months back. Apparently he's doing well.

"i just bought a bar/restaurant up here in frisco, colorado, and it has consumed my every last breath.... yes, those moments you mention were highlights of my party career... and it is only topped by my being married in the elvis chapel in las vegas to a little 23 year old brazilian chickie."

WHERE ARE THEY NOW?

Does anyone have information on the following brothers?

Dump
Dover
Icabod
Bob Demaine
Lumpy
Dez
Fred
Joel
Wagon
Mississippi
Sassafras
Mitty
Biskup
KC